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usahay makapangutana ko, naminhod na ba ang mga tawo aning nasura. grabe jud sa karenderya sa eskina ang usa ka kumkom nga kan-on nga tag-ocho pesos, dili jud na makabusog. Nga gani ako nakabentaha isip usa ka call boy (sa callcenter ba) unya nagdawatan pa jud ug foreign aid sa akong "other ATM" a.k.a "ay ta ma!". pero ngano jud nga hilabihan ko ka reklamador...why cant i just shut the fuck up and live like the rest of the living dead...hahay mangambisyon makatungtong ug amerika... magnar-es or di ba kaha mag-artista. naa ra jud anang duha. mao ra man nay gipangandoy sa kadaghanan. kevs to the fact nga mahal plite..mahal bugas...hasta ang burikat di na madala ug singko singko kay mahal na daw ang kape nga 3 in 1. adto nalang siguro ko sa manok.
one thing i realized while i was in the states was despite the fact that everyone lived relatively easy lives...or rather really good lives as compared the shit and piss we get from the measly skrills of our slavelike salaries in the fucking philippines... the american middle class still has one thing we filipino don't have much in practice: Dissent.
There's a saying that Americans are more honest than polite and Filipinos are more Polite than honest. Stop... think and let the pain bite through your whistling heads. It's sad that we've got almost none in the hand yet we don't give a shit while them americans got lots and yet when a quarter of a dollar of gas price increase and it's a hell break loose for a week with the local congressman. See i think we all know that for a real working democracy to work, you and i... and everyone has got to stop and think while the lady in the karenderya scoop the meager amounts of rice for a fucking 8 pesos. We the filipinos, the goddamn rice eaters...not potato eaters or bread hoarders can't even give shit why the very grain that has sustained our lovely nation is going up hay wire... for a working democracy to work, the people has got to be involved, redress doesn't come in a silver platter, it comes throughg blood and sweet of history...but all of us do the same thing again and again. like nothing happened. We are numb. Numb i guess from all that "lobo" stuff and judy ann santoses and pinoy big brothers and whatever social opium we rather indulge our whistling heads.
It pains me to think, that i've been judged as poor and poked fun by a co-worker just because i decided to not care with what i wear for work when in reality my financial terms would eat hers triple times that.
it pains me to think that a hospital nurse wouldn't treat you so well and be very nonchalant 'till she hears you complain in a totally american accent english without blinking staring at her eye like a good ol mensch for such a sloppy slow ass service while you slap her with that fact that i'll pay you whatever money to buy some good old health care service.
It pains me to think that when urging for dissent...my people responds with numbness. La la la la la.
el precio de gasolina en el mercado del mundo esta aumentado a hoy. Poreso, mejores de los gentes en este paises muy pobres, por ejemplo, los filipinos tiene problemas con el govierno. hay son muchos manifestaciones y otro accion en el mundo como en el espana y mas en sus reclamos por los aumentos sin finales.
?pero que estamos filipinos? donde son los cojones de los pueblos? por que no hay son mobilizacion en somos calles en demandamos para mas efectivos soluciones en respestua por tienes problemas.
en nuestra cultura, un nuevo 'cell phone' son mas importantes compara a los otros necesidades especialimente gratis "health care" para los todos hombres y mujeres, particularimente los pobres y obreros con salarios minimo. 5 anos antes de a hoy, los uniones de los transportacion como KMU y otros, tienemos muchos manifestaciones en la calle para protetestar los aumentos en el precio de gasolina y el policia deregulacion de govierno por la precio de gasolina en este pais... pero los pueblos no hay suporta o manifesta solidaridad por la causa de los uniones. esta tienemos culpa por la inaccion antes a hora situaciones mal. y mira...como esta la problema de arroz??? pendejo, responde por favor, paso a hora por favor.
While i rode a jeep from shitty hall going to capitol, i wondered about the crazy fender bender when it was 12ish noon. Then as we slowly creep into the decrepit and decaying Colon street, the heart of downtown cebu, lo and and behold where the throngs of militants on the march. nostalgic but sad, i felt i met an ex-wife from a bad court battle. It all came back to me now when exactly 5 years ago, this day was when i officially became a bad ass radical in the city. i gave my dad's 38 caliber pistol away (and without him knowing) to wherever i thought it was more useful.
The rally back then was 5x bigger and way more fun with college activists running the show. There was more enthusiasm and optimism that whatever we where fighting for was the "it". So I finally met them in capitol by the end of the march, and i went to greet some old faces and shared some cigs. There was nothing political in our exchanges, or even with the "lords" didn't even bother to talk anything about the current issues. We must have shared the mutual feeling that this has been so 5 years ago for us. I guess the truth will always be there, but real as it is, we all are humans and we do tire and feel burnt out. So ask ourselves: when can this be really over? I dunno for them, but personally the shelf life of this brand of radicalism has long been expired for many of us who now drink to reminisce these priceless nostalgia.
the dreadful reality creeps in slowly as the days pass. my armor and first line of defense - will and steadfastness is being tested. Just as my health is being battered by the elements of the third world: pollution, allergens, humidity and unbearable heat, so does my life's compass is being swayed to deriliction by backward elements of Philippine society. I would love to shit and puke everytime i flinch on how things work in my land of birth. It is inevitable that i end up self examining ourselves as a people when coming from a society that has worked well in many ways but utterly fail in our case. The slower pace of time, the satisfaction for the 2nd rate and mediocrity, and most especially the obsession of our people to technicalities and missing out the essence of things. I could care less and forgive ourselves easy, however one thing i can never forgive is how we refuse to reinvent our collective attitudes and worse defend and be complacent to these realities that most of us are self aware. We need aggression as a people, we badly need frankness and blunt no nonsense bullshit talk instead of our allegedly famous docility and hospitality. we need less of sensitivity and more of straight talk and nothing is personal attitude.
It is ingrained in pinoy society to avoid confrontation as much as possible, even if contradictions are brewing right to the rim, we always smile and say 'its ok' is just idiotic and then back stab on the side as a payback. nothing personal in my case but a general observation on how contradictions always play out in our society. No one can take their word for it as body language probably speaks more than what people actually say.
i would love to pay someone to stand and listen as i'd blurt out my irritation in tourette's mode.
I always ask myself, right now am i lucky or cursed? when i'll jump ship and swan dive in the shit infested waters, i will ask myself again the question. you know some people say life is a game of dice, and i just hate it everytime i hear that. it makes people stupider than they actually are. we may as well dumb down ourselves and rely on tarot cards and fuzzy crystal balls, yet it's equally painfull to admit that sometime in all of us, we stand at uncertain crossroads where all but the dice won't help. god help my soul.
i never felt more gloomier than yesterday, and if it's as if things weren't worse enough, the weather had conspired as it rained all thoughout the day. the kind of annoying stop and go rain, whether to take your umbrella or not and end up looking silly with it, while most people are or aren't using it, you try to weigh things up. just effin' great! both my calves (or as what cebuanos love to say with a heavy glottap stop 'bagtak') where such in a sorry state condition. pain in the ass was also the adhd meets sexist humourist mixology instructor, or maybe was it really him or the 2 cups of coffee, a double shot espresso and countless roll your own cigs in a gloomy day in the city? i can definitely use the dirtiest martini around.
I dont f*ckn care if nobody can relate to this, but i am just so happy with the recent turn of events. it's as if i've been resurected from the dead. only a couple of days left and i am so outta here.
p.s.
to ya'll bitches in the big city, you can suck it. i'll kick your butts someday, and you'll all regret it the day you'd fucked me up.
sad to say..im locked in a cursed perpetual battle against cigarettes... though i actually did quit for about 3 years. unfortunately, i allowed myself time and again to slip on countless times in the last few months. i dunno if i should still even consider myself a successfull quiter. i'd say i cut myself some slack whenever there's a dirty martini and long island icedteas. but who am i kidding? when the booze comes around so often these days, i feel like some paula abdul. well at least im laying off the doobie.
the mall's full of candies and chocolatey hearts and whatnot. i wanna puke. but im out of synch with the rest of the world anyway. oh better get back under the rock i live in. lol...
Taliwala sa mga maayong balita nga mikusog ang binayloay sa kwartang piso kontra dolyar makaingon ba kitang arangan na kita o nagpadayon ba kaha gihapon sa kawad-on?
Nagagikan ako sa pamilyang napuno sa mga manunudlo. Gani sa ikatulong henerasyon na ako. Tungod sa tukmang kalisod sa pagpanginabuhi, milangyaw kining akong inhanan isip usa usab ka manunudlo dinhi sa US. Naapil na kami sa taas kaayong listahan sa mga pinoy'ng milangyaw, nga mikabat na sa 11 milyones nga naapodapod sa tibuok kalibutan.Diha sa bag-ong nawong sa pangkalibutanong ekonimiya ug pamulitika, nahanaw naman ang mga utlanan ug babag sa mga kagusto sa mga gamhanang kanasuran susama sa amerika. Bisan alkanse ang mga gagmayng nasud niana. Sa laing balita, saksi ta karon sa pagkusog sa kwarta sa atong nasud, gikan sa P50 nagkaduol na sa P40 sa binayloay sa dolyar karon. Makahibulongang pangutana sa nagu-ol kong inahan: nganung mikunhod ang binayloay karon pa nga pasko ug panahon sa pagpadalag kwarta sa pilipinas?
Purdoy man gud ta maong milangyaw. Dili ko ganahn musulayag tuki kung unsaon pagsulbad sa atong pagkakabus, kay diha gani na atong gubyerno, sa pagkahimugso niani atol sa pagkahuman sa ikaduhang pangkalibutanong gubat ug hangtod karon pabiling pa gihapong pakyas . Ug kay ngano, kun ang kadaghanan usab sa nagdumala sa pangagamhanan mao ray usab miunay sa pagmangawat sa atong nasudnong kaban. Ingon nga nangahurot na ang mga buaya sa atoang mga suba ug sapa apan tua diay nagpunsisok sa batasan o sa ubang sangay sa gubyerno. Wala makuntento sa pagpangurakot, nag-away pang mga wa'y uwaw'ng hanggaw, naginilugay sa gahum, diha sa mga kudeta hangtod sa mga way kahumanang isyu sa pagpanuhol sa mga pulitiko. Dili hinuon tanan, adunay pipilay anaa sa tarong nga buot, ug naningkamot gyung mapauswag sa ilang ginsakpan.
Ang sukod ba sa tinuodanayng pagbaskog sa ekonomiya mao ba ang mga numerong gipanghambog?Susama sa mga figures sa GDP, GNP, interest rates , Central bank fiscal reports, currency rates ug uban pang istatistiko? maayo tingali kini sa mga pipila nga naay dagkong negosyo apan kung pangutan-un ang kadaghanang yanong tao, ang sukod dili ba mao ang presyo sa lana, presyo sa mga makaon ug uban pang palaliton sa panimalay, O ang mga tamdanan gihisgutan sa taas?
Apan lantawon nato ang dagan sa kwarta sa ubang kanasuran sa Asya, makaingon ta nga dili lang diay kita ra ang mikusog kun dili tanan sa rehiyon. Kini diay pod tungod sa naghuyang nga ekonomiya sa Amerika , diin ang ang mga gagmayng ekonomiya lakip na ang pinas, nahigot. Ubos sa pagdumala ni George Bush, padayong giusik-usikan ang binilyong dolyares sa tatawng pakyas nga gubat sa iraq ug afghanistan, samtang ang mga panginahanglang 'domestic' gipalangawan. Diha miagi ang bagyong katrina sa new orleans, hangtod karon dugta gihapon ang mga kabalayan didto.
Sa pikas bahin usab nganung nikusog ang binayloay? Kay ang mga makaluluy-ong pilipinong imigrante susama niining akong inahang daw mga "bag-ong bayani" kuno pas bulatik sa DFA, mikabat na sa milyon-milyon ang gipadalang dolyar alang sa mga kabanay mao usab diay nagpabaskog sa atong ekonomiya karon.Kadaut sa atong gubyerno, alang kanila, ang paglangyaw sa mga pinoy labina ang mga propesyonal, maoy sulbad, apan sa tinud-anay, kini tima-ilhan sa kapakyasan sa kasamtangang kahigayonan sa atong ekonomiya. Kung akoy pabut-on dili na unta mulangyaw pa ang mga pilipino, labi na gyud ang mga propesyonal, aron mangitag kapanginabuhian. Angayan nagikan ang kusog sa atong ekonomiya sa singot ug dugo sa atong katawhan diha sa atong nasud ug dili sa mga milangyawng Pilipino, kay kun kabubut-on pa sa kadaghanan kanato, ngano gud intawong mulangyaw pa, mahilayo ug magkabuak sa pamilya, ilabina nas panahon sa pasko, aron kita isip nasud, mabuhi sa kasamtangang panahon?
